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Thread: Video of You pt Deux

  1. #121
    McHenryCruiser's Avatar
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    Re: Video of You pt Deux

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mHWdJ...feature=relmfu

    Me making racist jokes in oakland



  2. #122
    McHenryCruiser's Avatar
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    Re: Video of You pt Deux

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e7QCE...feature=relmfu

    Me at the comedy cellar in san fran.



  3. #123
    ificouldjumpinhere's Avatar
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    Re: Video of You pt Deux

    Here's a ten-minute said i did in the finals of a competition last week. i placed 2nd.

    http://youtu.be/X0CSlhV0mgo



    2 members found this post helpful.

  4. #124
    MJEH's Avatar
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    Re: Video of You pt Deux

    ^^ Looks like Anthony Jeselnik has some competition.
    "Except for MJEH. He is an irredeemable fiend who should be locked up!!" - Alex Mac



  5. #125
    ificouldjumpinhere's Avatar
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    Re: Video of You pt Deux

    super incredible set i did last night! the crowd response was amazing!!!

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QmOwZhWQ5d8




  6. #126

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    Re: Video of You pt Deux

    Quote Originally Posted by ificouldjumpinhere View Post
    super incredible set i did last night! the crowd response was amazing!!!

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QmOwZhWQ5d8
    that gir's laugh is annoying


    1 members found this post helpful.

  7. #127

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    Re: Video of You pt Deux

    This is one of my first open-mic sets, and the first time I've shared anything with the outside world. Apologies for the poor lighting. I haven't retried most of this material yet but I've been rewriting a lot of it and I have it better memorized now, so I'm looking forward to reintroducing some of it (besides the Cheerios joke which was time-sensitive).

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EDhNAhdjvTw



  8. #128

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    Re: Video of You pt Deux

    Your jokes are pretty well written for a first timer, but I had a lot of trouble being invested in your premises. Many of them are either false or too trivial for my taste.

    Here's me on a showcase 1.5 years into stand up in Lancaster, PA.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ilt_2ybXrY4



  9. #129
    funkyrhino's Avatar
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    Re: Video of You pt Deux

    Quote Originally Posted by PoisonSpanking View Post
    Your jokes are pretty well written for a first timer, but I had a lot of trouble being invested in your premises. Many of them are either false or too trivial for my taste.

    Here's me on a showcase 1.5 years into stand up in Lancaster, PA.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ilt_2ybXrY4
    Unless you know a person personally you have no idea if his premises are false. No offense but it kills me when people say false premise. A false premise would be blatant. Like me (being black) saying I tried to join the KKK the other day and I found out that ...blah, blah. That's a blatant false premise. I did an old joke where I said I was in a White Power Band - we were called 'Confused!' and it got great responses and not once did anyone call me out on the false premise. If a joke is good run with it. Probably half of Anthony Jeselniks material is made up of premises that aren't true but I'm not going I don't like that joke because you don't have a girlfriend who has AIDS.



  10. #130

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    Re: Video of You pt Deux

    Quote Originally Posted by PoisonSpanking View Post
    Your jokes are pretty well written for a first timer, but I had a lot of trouble being invested in your premises. Many of them are either false or too trivial for my taste.

    Here's me on a showcase 1.5 years into stand up in Lancaster, PA.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ilt_2ybXrY4
    Right, that's probably one of my main issues right now. I don't have a lot of... issues, so I tend to dwell in kind of fanciful misinterpretations of every-day life or things I notice in pop culture, or just silly made-up scenarios that allow me to make a joke. The only other option I see, at this point, is to do material about stuff like Iraq, and I really don't want to do that. Thanks for watching and taking the time to comment.



  11. #131

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    Re: Video of You pt Deux

    Maybe I used the term false premise wrong because it was four in the morning and I'm dumb. I wasn't saying he was telling stories meant to be true that I didn't believe. I meant he was doing bits where the internal logic falls apart instantly under any kind of thought. Why would we be worried about cartoon bees?

    I don't actually feel qualified to give other people comedy advice, but I thought it was rude to post a video without critiquing the guy above me.



  12. #132

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    Re: Video of You pt Deux

    I'd be worried as hell about giant talking bees, but point taken. I like your Juwanna Mann bit.



  13. #133

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    Re: Video of You pt Deux




  14. #134

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    Re: Video of You pt Deux

    here's a recent one of mine for those who want to return the shitting on
    http://youtu.be/3RTCiEb0uEk



  15. #135

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    Re: Video of You pt Deux

    Quote Originally Posted by funkyrhino View Post
    Unless you know a person personally you have no idea if his premises are false. No offense but it kills me when people say false premise. A false premise would be blatant. Like me (being black) saying I tried to join the KKK the other day and I found out that ...blah, blah. That's a blatant false premise. I did an old joke where I said I was in a White Power Band - we were called 'Confused!' and it got great responses and not once did anyone call me out on the false premise. If a joke is good run with it. Probably half of Anthony Jeselniks material is made up of premises that aren't true but I'm not going I don't like that joke because you don't have a girlfriend who has AIDS.

    It's very common when you're starting out to write jokes that are basically joke craft structure on contrived situations. Anytime I hear someone with nothing but false premises "I was at the grocery store with my girlfriend..." the entire time all I think during their set is 'no you weren't.' There's the rare exception sure but most people will get to the funny faster by helping me see the world through their eyes and commenting on their true feelings about a subject. Like anything else there are those who've achieved great success by any otherwise shit upon method.

    A veteran comic when I was struggling with this issue told me, 'don't tell me what you "think" is funny, tell me WHY you think something is funny." I'm sure I'm more of a stickler against false premise because I was unfunny when that was my focus and molding my act to discuss things that were true to me or reflected how I actually felt/thought that I started to get big laughs.

    In general I'll stand by my critiques of 'false premise' tho.



  16. #136

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    Re: Video of You pt Deux

    Quote Originally Posted by nixonjames View Post
    Anytime I hear someone with nothing but false premises "I was at the grocery store with my girlfriend..." the entire time all I think during their set is 'no you weren't.'
    What if you were though? I mean it's not particularly unusual to go to the grocery store with your girlfriend. Like I tell a joke in that video about going to Walgreen's and seeing a sign that said "Stop Smoking Aids" which isn't that far off from the grocery store/girlfriend example, but it's a true story.



  17. #137
    funkyrhino's Avatar
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    Re: Video of You pt Deux

    Quote Originally Posted by nixonjames View Post
    It's very common when you're starting out to write jokes that are basically joke craft structure on contrived situations. Anytime I hear someone with nothing but false premises "I was at the grocery store with my girlfriend..." the entire time all I think during their set is 'no you weren't.' There's the rare exception sure but most people will get to the funny faster by helping me see the world through their eyes and commenting on their true feelings about a subject. Like anything else there are those who've achieved great success by any otherwise shit upon method.

    A veteran comic when I was struggling with this issue told me, 'don't tell me what you "think" is funny, tell me WHY you think something is funny." I'm sure I'm more of a stickler against false premise because I was unfunny when that was my focus and molding my act to discuss things that were true to me or reflected how I actually felt/thought that I started to get big laughs.

    In general I'll stand by my critiques of 'false premise' tho.
    But why focus on what you feel may or may not be true? I've gone to the mall, grocery store etc with my girlfriend. I don't have a joke for it but if someone else does I'm not going to call out BS. I see plenty of couples in stores. I know when a friend of mine does his set everything just happened the other day (the other day I was at the zoo, the other day the collection agency called...) and we all know the other day means 6 months to 6 years ago.
    Some premises are obvious lies. Amy Shumer - I just slept with my high school crush! No she didn't, but I dont' care. The punch was funny.
    We give them the benefit because she's a known veteran who thrives on misdirection. If Amy was new to comedy she wouldn't receive that type of pass. Same with Jeselnik and others.
    I think every audience ear/funny bone is different. Some people just don't care especially if the possibility of the premise happening is high.
    The only time I call out BS or rather I feel disconnected is when I can see through things. I heard a 27/28 year old comic do a set about getting old and how he can't go to dance clubs anymore. I wasn't feeling the joke/premise or anything because I'm in my 40's so in my mind I'm like "kiss my ass" I don't care if he has a good punchline or resolution - He lost me at getting old.



  18. #138

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    Re: Video of You pt Deux

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fr67R6Wy11Y

    Me opening for Joe DeRosa in Lancaster, PA.



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