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About LinkBacksYou know it!Originally Posted by Lustful Gustav
You know it!
Not saying you're not a drunk or whatever but from the stories you told it seems like maybe it's more about hanging out with some dude you can't stand. Like...sometimes you SHOULD yell at assholes, right?
TV innit
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Last edited by slothborn; October 7, 2012 at 9:05 AM.
Sounds like when you drink, things are worse. So why not walk away from it?
Sitting in your apartment drinking whiskey and listening to podcasts isn't that far from drinking in your basement watching TV. There's a genetic predilection for alcoholism, and it sounds like you have the set of genes to win that prize.
If it's hard for you to quit, or if life seems weird and complicated without liquor, hit a meeting. There are a lot of other people there with the same issues.
"Getting clean is the easy part. Now comes life."--Steve Earle's character in The Wire, Season 1, episode 10
Totally.
slothborn, It's not unreasonable to be furious at someone who makes snide comments about Kindler. But the blowing up, then the guilt and shame may have been tamped down without the 5 pints.
I can relate to this. And I found it impossible to address my fear of commitment while I was drinking. I'm not doing a great job of it sober, but my life and sense of self have taken a turn for the better since I put down the bottle. You sound like a thoughtful and self-reflective guy, and not drinking may amplify your fears, self-doubts, and such. But I bet you won't wake up after a night on the town wondering if you are a jerk or not.
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Last edited by slothborn; October 7, 2012 at 9:05 AM.
Just a thought... When I got sober I had a good job and was seemingly all right in a lot of ways. However, 4.4 years later, I feel like I really didn't start living until I got sober. I arranged so much of my life around drinking that I was sure busy and that seemed like great living to me, but I wasn't doing much at all really. Now my life is full of wonderful stuff and I'm glad I know the difference.
I'm on day 13 of my sobriety, and I attended the first of 12 meetings last night as part of an outpatient substance abuse program. During the meeting, I actually said, "I'm an alcoholic," for the first time out loud. Now, don't get all congratulatory on me; I only said it because I was last in a sequence of everyone saying, "I'm an addict and alcoholic," and I didn't want to follow that with, "I drank too much, and now I don't want to drink as much."
So far, so good.
Also, I started playing Skyrim for the first time a few days ago, so I don't have time to drink or even sleep.
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Last edited by slothborn; October 7, 2012 at 9:05 AM.
You wouldn't want to date someone who isn't understanding.
I dated a lot when I first got sober because I had to get my jollies somehow. I loved it. I was concerned, too, until my shrink told me its a lot like tripping. He was right. Navigating the emotional/hormonal rollercoaster of dating is a drug onto itself. Learning to be comfortable in my own skin without booze gave me more confidence, which made me feel super sexy, which led to fun times.
My wife has been great and is pretty happy about me quitting, especially since it means less money spent at bars and more money for other things (women be shoppin'!) There have been a few moments where she had a quick pang of wishing for the old days, where we would go out barhopping regularly, but then she remembers that around hour number two I turned into a douchenozzle.
Speaking of friends, two of mine who had been sober just recently both hopped off the wagon with gusto. Both say that this time they're sure they can handle it and won't end up going overboard. I wouldn't say either is an alcoholic but they both have had multiple instances of passing out in bars, blacking out, etc. I guess we'll see. Tomorrow is 77 days sober for me and I have no desire to join them.
When I'm not drinking I sometimes get a clear non alcoholic beverage in a rocks glass, with a lime. That way people won't bother me with the "Why aren't you drinking?" type questions. Plus it tends to make me feel like I'm fitting in more. Most people don't care that your not drinking so basically you have to do whatever it takes to make you feel comfortable.
I know some sober people who are totally fine with going to bars and hanging out. They tend to be very straight forward individuals. If you ask them why their not drinking they will pretty much say "Because I fucking can't." or "I'm an alcoholic." Other people really do have to adjust where they go and who they are with.
"Not the victory but the action. Not the goal but the game. In the deed the glory."
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Last edited by slothborn; October 7, 2012 at 9:05 AM.
That's great to hear dude. Sometimes I'll order a coke with grenadine because it feels "drinky".
Last edited by Cliffalus; March 7, 2012 at 7:53 PM. Reason: typo
I had my third meeting last night, and I'm enjoying it more and more. Surprisingly, I'm volunteering to speak much more than I thought I would (sober, no less!) There are a few jerks in the group, however, that can't seem to stop talking to each other while someone else has the floor. I was SECONDS away from turning to them and saying, "Hey, we listened to you guys when it was your turn to speak, how about you extend the same courtesy to the rest of us?" But they were a couple of Southie punks, there by court order, and I didn't want to get my ass kicked after the meeting. OR DID I?
I'm 16 days sober, and I'm looking forward to a nice weekend of Skyrim, cleaning my apartment, laundry, and more Skyrim. This program is only a four week program (one week down, three to go,) and I haven't decided what my next move will be. I'm pretty confident in my ability to stay clean, but I need to work on going out, being social without relying on alcohol, and returning to the real me from years ago, before I started boozing it up. It's weird to think I drank away my twenties.
Regarding this thread, I honestly don't care why people are here, what opinions they post, or what level of substance use they currently enjoy. I'm happy to be supportive of anyone trying to better themselves, and I'm glad AST is full of funny, insightful, honest, passionate, and supportive people. It's taken me a while to develop skin thick enough to enjoy some of the snark around here, and I'm glad I've stuck around.
I want to thank you all again for reading my ramblings and providing honest feedback. Don't ever worry that something you post will drive me back to substance abuse. I should add, in no way do I speak for anyone else on this board or in this thread; my sobriety is my own. No need to hold back. If you think it might be inappropriate for this thread, I welcome a PM instead.
Alright, you motherfuckers, get back to whatever the hell it is you've been doing in this thread!
Love,
Kruddy Buddy
Ironically, I just "cleaned up" the Sobriety thread. Let's all be positive and supportive of each other. No more fighting, okay? Let's move on.
I'm now addicted to vegan chocolate covered raisins I found at the Jewish market. I haven't had those in years. Ahhh!
Iyou.
This is going to be a great episode of Intervention.
"Not the victory but the action. Not the goal but the game. In the deed the glory."
My roommate has thrown up three times so far and is still in bed. I love waking up with a clear head and I certainly do not miss the days of marathon hangovers. Life is good.
I
The thread was fine, warts and all. It's only natural that arguments arise when a topic like this is being discussed, but in the end everybody should be capable to move on all on their own.Ironically, I just "cleaned up" the Sobriety thread. Let's all be positive and supportive of each other. No more fighting, okay? Let's move on.
Doesn't make any difference now, of course. Just voicing my opinion.
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