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About LinkBacksSATAN IS WRONGOriginally Posted by Big McLargehuge
WE WIN
LOL
SATAN IS WRONG
WE WIN
LOL
TV innit
I was on the L train coming home just now, and there was a man with apparently no shame whatsoever talking on his cell phone. He said (loud enough that the entire car could hear it):
"I drink so much, my dick doesn't even stay hard anymore."
At least ten people turned and looked at him.
Sounds like a @Humblebrag to me!
Oh yeah. Obviously, we hooked up and partied til our dicks didn't work.
Standing in the chip aisle in a grocery store. A kid, maybe 6 is surveying the selection and finally starts jumping up to reach Doritos on the top shelf. His father comes down the aisle.
Father: No, Kyle..she said she wanted CHIPS not DORITOS!
Kyle: (exasperated) Please...explain to me what qualifies as a chip?
What was the best concert you've been to?
"Probably Sade. It was just so sexy and relaxing."
At a department store a while ago, a guy to the girl he's with:
"I mean, I've been called a genius before, and I've been called a freak, but never both."
Someone oughta teach you some manners by eating your soul.
Someone walking behind me. Not sure who he was talking to.
"It's not racist if the guy actually looks like Uncle Ben!"
What was the best concert you've been to?
"Probably Sade. It was just so sexy and relaxing."
My dad was watching "Fringe" in another room. I overheard him say, with 100% sincerity: "Why can't the two worlds just get along?"
Guy at a restaurant: "I was buying ramps before they were trendy."
Middle aged woman on her cell phone.
"She absolutely refuses to visit the new gravesite. She thinks because we moved it there's going to be some voodoo and evil spirits there. She thinks a ghost is going to follow her home."
at the TGI Friday's bar at the pittsburgh airport: two middle aged dudes who look like they're on a golf vacation and probably cheat on their wives with their secretaries.
dude one: "i don't eat anything green. it's bad for you."
dude two: "only eat it if it had hooves."
then they both laughed really, really hard.
Haha, they're going to die in their 50s at the very latest, jokes on them!
"The wisdom and the the spiritual beauty within Roy Jr ... it's just effin sick!"
At a Souplantation. A man is ladeling soup into his bowl. His young son runs up to him, trying to excitedly tell him that he had just talked to an army guy (a uniformed soldier had just said "What's up, little man!" to him).
Dad: "Are you talking to me about soup?"
Son: "No?"
Dad: "Then why are you talking right now?"
I read that as an an 'uninformed' army guy and wondered how you knew he wasn't up on current events. On another note I feel like my recent acquisition of an iPod Nano has hindered my participation in this thread.
What was the best concert you've been to?
"Probably Sade. It was just so sexy and relaxing."
But you always have the best ones! Damn, that monk drop his biscuits!
Guy in line at Togo's sandwich shop:
"We saw Carrot Top over by Baja Fresh."
Walking to work, elderly (probably Jewish) lady really happily and excitedly on her cell phone: "And Natalie Portman had a baby boy!"
Three heavy-set black women with a camera taking pictures of other customers while stumbling out of IHOP:
"We tha paparazzo!!!"
Co-workers this morning:
Person 1: "He sort of looks like that guy from The Hangover..."
Person 2: "Oh, Zach Milonakis or whatever?"
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