Overheard in Passing

[Adult Ed]

The receptionist at work, on a personal call:

"... I just let my Barnes and Noble membership expire and now you want to read a book. I've known you for five years and this is the first time you want to read a book..."

[TimBuktu]

An old lady sitting behind me at lunch coughed and hacked and spit for 30 minutes straight today. I didn't say anything to her because of Drag Me to Hell.

[Harry B]

Two stoner kids walking:

"Yeah, I saw a midget skateboarding the other day! He was doing little ollies and shit too!"

[Adult Ed]

Two stoner kids walking:

"Yeah, I saw a midget skateboarding the other day! He was doing little ollies and shit too!"

A stoner kid rented Jackass?

[smartbunny]

An old lady sitting behind me at lunch coughed and hacked and spit for 30 minutes straight today. I didn't say anything to her because of Drag Me to Hell.

That's a good point, but I still figure that, if she's a gypsy, there's at least a 50/50 shot of her cursing me with "THINNER!" and I could stand to lose a few. So I mouth off to every old lady I see. I'm willing to take that risk.

[Harry B]

A parent sitting at the table behind me at brunch:

"Spencer, please refrain from using your head as a weapon."

[rabbitandox]

This is an ad on Craigslist:

"Hot Chicks needed@ xxx lawn care"

[aenemaTron]

A parent sitting at the table behind me at brunch:

"Spencer, please refrain from using your head as a weapon."

Hey everyone, listen to how clever I am when I discipline my children! He may not understand me, but you think I'm funny!

[isoS]

Probably writes movies for DreamWorks Animation.

[MrDys]

This is an ad on Craigslist:

"Hot Chicks needed@ xxx lawn care"

Dammit. This is a business idea that my mom really wanted to get going. The key was having them wear high heels so that the lawn gets aerated as it is mowed (mown?).

[Having Fun!]

Two people eating lunch at a Chicago take out place.

Guy 1:I just don't like triangle based architecture
(beat)
Guy 2: Excuse me?

[DiscoInferiorityComplex]

"Stand" by REM starts playing in the background. 20-ish Woman next to me turns to her friend and says "Who is this? The Offspring?"

[scamboogah]

My company's receptionist (who is an idiot) on the phone with a restaurant trying to plan the Christmas party;

"Now what exactly is a Portabella?"

"Key Lime Pie? Is that like a cheescake?"

[smartbunny]

Steak? Is that like chicken from a cow?

Lady standing still, screaming into her phone on 58th Street in Brooklyn: "NO YOU DON'T! YOU GONNA GET THE ICE CREAM? YOU GONNA GET THE ICE CREAM? FUCKING ICE CREAM! YOU GET IT!"

I paused Jordan, Jesse Go! and cracked my car window so I could hear.

[maxbarth]

Two guys in the business school cafe at my college -
"Did you see Out Cold?"
"Not yet."

All completely serious. I forgot not everyone is in on the joke.

[Alex King]

Old man on the bus, apropos of nothing, "You don't let anyone say anything to you. You mind your own. You mind your affairs."

[Gene George]

Old man on the bus, apropos of nothing, "You don't let anyone say anything to you. You mind your own. You mind your affairs."

Were you riding the bus in a Stephen King novel?

[Alex King]

It was a Dean Koontz novel.

[Having Fun!]

Im in a cafe and this anime club from the local college start piling in there. One of the anime superfans said this. In one sentence.

"Im gonna make a portal from tokyo to here and charge people 1000 dollars to use it and get cocaine"

[RoyalDutchOfDukes]

Im in a cafe and this anime club from the local college start piling in there. One of the anime superfans said this. In one sentence.

"Im gonna make a portal from tokyo to here and charge people 1000 dollars to use it and get cocaine"

Well if you know of a better way to get cocaine I'd like to hear it. Also, please stop eavesdropping on me.