Did not feel sorry for the comic when heckling began

[Phil]

So hecklers are the biggest douchebags in the universe according to some lame documentary I recently purchased. But I've been out to way too many clubs and did not feel sorry for the comic when heckling began...

- When the comic asks the audience a million not-so-rhetorical questions. What a surprise, everyone shouts out things, and sorry if the audience doesn't stop and start exactly when the comic wants them too. "You idiots are just supposed to setup my joke!!"

- When the comic is clearly bombing and sways from their material to attack the audience. "Why aren't you laughing?" "They were laughing here last night" "What's wrong with you people!?" ...yeah, it's our fault we blew $10 and you ain't funny, asshole.

- When the comic rips into a random audience member endlessly for no apparent reason. Did the audience member heckle first? Rip into him. Did the audience member just sit close to the front and mind his own business when the comic decided to tear into you for five minutes straight cause he needed a victim for his latest barrage of hack insult jokes? Heckle back.

I wouldn't heckle for any reason, but it's just no surprise when the audience does for these reasons. Comics seem to bring this onto themselves quite often.

[tuggboat]

I miss you Phil Hartman. Oh and I've been meaning to ask... Is it just a coincidence that both you and John Ritter died shortly after making a Christmas themed movie? I mean, you died in 1998, just 2 years after you made an appearance in "Jingle All The Way". Then 5 years later "Bad Santa" comes along and sure enough John Ritter dies around the same time. I guess what I'm trying to ask is... Do we have good reason to fear the life of Vince Vaughn? I mean, first "Fred Claus" then "Four Christmases"? Come on.

[Alex Mac]

Not to sound too snappy but can I safely assume that you've never had to deal with it onstage yourself? If so, than you're not quite in the best position to judge here. Sometimes it really is unwarented.

Your examples presume that the comic in question turns it on the audience by either assaulting their intelligence or outright attacking them personally. If the comic does, for example, suddenly snap on an audience for (seemingly) not being receptive then, yes, he is a total dick. But sometimes it really does boil down to someone who drank too much or someone with an overdeveloped ego who thinks they have the right to ruin other people's entertainment because they tossed down a five spot for the cover charge.

[Ethan]

Doug Benson gave a wonderful response to a drunk idiot at the Benson Interruption tonight who had just decided she had the right to interject into the show whenever a thought popped in her head.

She had been yelling little things all night and the performers had either just been briefly indulging her by responding or just ignoring her. But it finally reached a tipping point towards the end of Todd Glass's set:

Drunk woman: (waving her hands in the air) Doug! Doug! It's my friend's birthday!
Doug: Then go to Chuck E. Cheese's where they give a shit! *Huge applause*

Todd then jumped on the band-wagon and described how the crowds at the UCB are always so great and supportive and always willing to go along with a bit that's not fully realized. And when someone like that woman shows up it's like "a whole bunch of diamonds with a steaming pile of shit in the middle."

Unfortunately she probably thinks we were all laughing WITH her, not AT her for being a cunt. Alas. Some hecklers like that truly are just steaming piles of shit and there's no way to clean them up without getting your hands dirty.

[dorothy mantooth]

One such steaming pile sat right behind me a few weeks ago at Ferrell's "You're Welcome America. A Final Night With George W Bush." (N.B. I was front row, center. So she was second row, center.)

She kept yelling out nonsensical shit throughout the show, never seeming to realize that this wasn't stand-up, but a scripted PLAY. And it was at Largo, where such assholery is strictly verboten. Needless to say, no one appreciated it.

At one point Ferrell (as Bush), boasting of his nicknaming prowess, sent his "secret service" into the crowd with a mic so that folks might provide their first/last name and occupation in return for a nickname. (e.g. A guy who was a teacher was dubbed "Bookworm.")

Steaming Pile raised her hand (shocker!) and gave her name, "Marian Laid" and profession "Visual Effects Artist."

Ferrell: "Did you say 'LAID'?"
S.P.: "I did. Many times. Heh. Heh."
Ferrell: "I'm just gonna call you 'Dirty Little Whore."

Absolutely CLASSIC.

[Phil]

Not to sound too snappy but can I safely assume that you've never had to deal with it onstage yourself? If so, than you're not quite in the best position to judge here. Sometimes it really is unwarented.

You're totally right, I've yet to make it on stage. 95% of hecklers are douchebags, I'm talking about the other 5% here, the ones where the comics were out of line IMO.

[Kentock]

None of the examples you gave were really about heckling. In each one the comedian started talking directly to the crowd first. So you're not really arguing against anyone here.

[Phil]

None of the examples you gave were really about heckling. In each one the comedian started talking directly to the crowd first. So you're not really arguing against anyone here.

Ahh I see, so it's not even heckling. I guess the problem I have is that the comics then treat it like heckling, like they act agitated when the audience is yelling shit when they don't want them to.

[dougbenson]

what stink ass comedians are you seeing, phil? and do all the comedy clubs in heaven suck?

Drunk woman: (waving her hands in the air) Doug! Doug! It's my friend's birthday!
Doug: Then go to Chuck E. Cheese's where they give a shit! *Huge applause*

it should be noted the above is a stock line, but it's so effective and so perfectly summarizes my hatred of the "it's my birthday so i should be treated special" attitude that i use it every time i get the chance. but it doesn't work in towns where there isn't a chuck e. cheese.

(noted)

[smartbunny]

Andy Kindler had a weirdo heckler guy (who also bothered Lee Camp a bit) at Comix a few weeks ago. It wasn't like he was being malicious... he was just right in front kind of agreeing with everything that was said, like, "Oh that's true!" or "Yes I know about that!" and helpfully pointing out things We Needed To Know.

There was also one point where Andy said something about Carrot Top having a Vegas act (I think; if Andy is here he might remember better) and this lady in back randomly yells "WHO CARES?"

I don't know what the motivation is for these kinds of people. Who cares? You paid for a ticket, traveled to the venue, waited for a seat and sat down. YOU care. Shut up.

[aenemaTron]

It's not something to be proud of, really, when there's no good excuse for you to be heckling, ever. If someone is bad on stage, not laughing is punishment enough, no? For some reason I thought about rioting and looting, maybe because it is rooted in a similar feeling of anarchy and entitlement, but just because I think Wal-mart is terrible, it doesn't mean I think people who break the windows and rob the place are cool dudes.

I apologize, I posted this in between violent coughing fits.

[scamboogah]

I don't always feel sorry for the comic in that situation, but I ALWAYS feel sorry for the rest of the audience, myself included.

I've seen several comics who routinely turn on the audience and chew them out for not getting their jokes, and their act was never improved by the crowd yelling back. In fact, most of the time the shitty comic is counting on the crowd reacting so they can show off their 'battling' skills. Giving them no response at all alienates them from the crowd even further, and may (if they're not a total idiot) lead to them stopping this bullshit.

The 'lame documentary' was right. Hecklers are douchebags, but what you described is the comedians heckling the audience, so the statement still holds true.

[AmericasMobileDevice]

I am not even sure what most people consider heckling. Most the time when stuff happens it is just people being rude. Talking during sets is just as annoying as people yelling shit at you. Anything that pulls focus or interrupts the flow makes it much harder to do your job.

Yes there are times when it is just as much the comedian's fault as the audience member's fault but honestly that seem less common. More times then not it is some drunk jerk who randomly says something that has nothing to even do with the jokes. Sometimes people show up waiting to heckle. They sit there and before a joke comes out they are yelling shit.

If a comedian sucks the worst thing you can do is engage him or her. Just be quite very very quite. Then watch the flop sweat flow.

PS I hate when comedians rip into random audience members. I think that is why Don Rickles never became a successful comedian.

[Ethan]

Reading this thread made me want to watch this video again. And watching this video again made me want to post it in this thread (circle of life)



I know this has been posted before, but it seems relevant here and I think it deserves a bump.

[DJ Sam]

what stink ass comedians are you seeing, phil? and do all the comedy clubs in heaven suck?



it should be noted the above is a stock line, but it's so effective and so perfectly summarizes my hatred of the "it's my birthday so i should be treated special" attitude that i use it every time i get the chance. but it doesn't work in towns where there isn't a chuck e. cheese.

(noted)

That really was the perfect response. I had met that girl waiting for the bathroom, and she kept touching my hair asking "Why is it bluuuuooo?" I was so happy when you finally (kinda) got her to calm down. I do still wonder what was the deal with her friend and Craig Fergeson being a pervert.

[AmericasMobileDevice]

Last time I was up in San Francisco watching a show at The Punchline a group of birthday girls were in line for the show. The guy seating at them was on top of it and sat them in the back close to the door. When I asked a friend about it he said they do that on purpose. That way if the girls get loud they can intervene without having to go through the crowd and if they ask them to leave it will be a short walk. I get the feeling most clubs don't take that proactive stance and I respect the Punchline for doing it.

[AmericasMobileDevice]

Reading this thread made me want to watch this video again. And watching this video again made me want to post it in this thread (circle of life)



I know this has been posted before, but it seems relevant here and I think it deserves a bump.

To be fair audiences never respect biceps as much as they should. I mean that guy was ripped.

[Jono11]

but it doesn't work in towns where there isn't a chuck e. cheese.

Use Applebee's. Every town has one of those. Or a TGIF, or a Chili's, or an O'Flagadoul's or whatever.

[tuggboat]

Use Applebee's. Every town has one of those. Or a TGIF, or a Chili's, or an O'Flagadoul's or whatever.

The problem there is, although those restaurants give a free desert for birthdays, none of them specialize in birthdays. I think the best solution would be to call information before the show and ask for some alternative "pizza-party" restaurants. Even roller skating rinks have party rooms. It just comes down to the fact that specialized party restaurants are scientifically proven to be 56% funnier than any other type of eatery.

[Jono11]

It just comes down to the fact that specialized party restaurants are scientifically proven to be 56% funnier than any other type of eatery.

Funnier than T.G.I.O'ChiliBee's? Really?

The problem there is, although those restaurants give a free desert for birthdays, none of them specialize in birthdays.

Look, Chuck E. Cheese's may "specialize" in birthday parties, but I don't think they ever "gave a shit" about me or anyone like me when we had those dumbassed little parties there.

At Applebee's, THEY SING FOR YOU. That's "giving a shit."

A happy happy birthday,
From Applebee's to you
We wish it was our birthday,
But WE GIVE A SHIT ABOUT YOU.

I believe those are the lyrics to the song.